A look at what's right (and what's wrong) with today's screenplays

Claude Chabrol is often called the French Hitchcock. (Never mind that Hitchcock worked successfully in many different genres and that his true hallmark was absolute mastery of composition, camera movement and editing while Chabrol has no particular visual talent at all and largely sticks to psychological thrillers.) Unfortunately, his work is much more uneven than Hitch’s, and La Ceremonie does nothing to improve his batting average.

The film stars Sandrine Bonnaire as Sophie, a maid with a dreadful secret she’ll do anything to keep, namely that she’s illiterate. What sort of background did she come from that she never learned to read? Why didn’t she try to do something about the problem once she grew up? How has she managed to get by for so long, and what would happen if someone found out? The film leaves these pressing questions unanswered, and devotes no more time to sketching in any other aspects of her character either. She’s a chilly, unexpressive woman with no apparent goals or desires to help move the story forward, so most of the movie is effectively static. Her new employers, the well-to-do Lelievres, want her to cook and clean, so she cooks and cleans. The postal clerk she meets, Jeanne, played by Isabelle Huppert, wants to be her friend, so she hangs out with her and does whatever Jeanne feels like doing. She’s carried along like a leaf in the wind, and neither the leaf nor the wind prove to be particularly interesting.

Chabrol spends some time accumulating details of the comfortable existence the Lelievre family enjoys, but he never makes anything of the class contrast between them and Jeanne and Sophie, and he never connects any of it to the central conceit of the story, Sophie’s illiteracy, so both the class contrast and her illiteracy wind up just hanging in the air doing nothing. (If Sophie’s inability to read had actually posed any real danger to her, she might have at least become a somewhat more sympathetic character despite her aloofness, but as it stands, it’s clear that the Lelievres not only wouldn’t have fired her, they’d have been more than happy to pay for reading lessons.)  And then, at last, Sophie and Jeanne conduct the murderous ceremony of the title, but it means nothing and arouses no feelings whatsoever because it’s completely arbitrary and has no connection whatsoever to either Sophie’s inability to read or any kind of conflict, class or otherwise, between Sophie and the Lelievres.

There’s a very nice ironic plot twist at the very end, but it’s too bad it was wasted on this dud of a movie. There’s a lot of Chabrol I haven’t seen, but if you want a much better introduction to his work, check out The Bridesmaid. That actually has a point.

Tags: Arbitrary, Character Arc, Claude Chabrol, Consequences, Inner Conflict, Isabelle Huppert, Sandrine Bonnaire, Sympathy, Theme, Villain's Plan

If for some insane (or maybe inspired) reason I were to kidnap Ben Stiller, I’d immediately ask him, “What the heck was Tropic Thunder about?”

His first response would probably be something along the lines of, “It’s a satire of Hollywood in which a bunch of shallow, self-involved actors who think they’re making a Vietnam war movie get tangled up with a real-life drug gang in the middle of the jungle and wind up having to actually become the heroic characters they’d only been pretending to be before.”  Then of course I’d draw a gun and force him to put on a terrible straw-blond wig and a lot of white makeup and perform a stage show as a mentally handicapped character named “Simple Jack” until he cracked and gave me a real answer.

To backtrack a little, Tropic Thunder starts off pretty decently. There are some good laughs, including an unexpected death and a really vicious and hateful — and extremely funny — performance by Tom Cruise as an evil studio executive named Les Grossman. The problem is that it runs off the rails and mostly stops generating laughs pretty quickly, because Stiller and his co-writers didn’t have a clue what they really wanted the movie to be about, thematically speaking. At first, it seems like they wanted to savagely lampoon the film industry. But then later, out of nowhere some of the actor characters begin to grow up and become better people, and in the end, all the death and misery caused by the aborted and disastrous production of the Vietnam war movie-within-a-movie gets “redeemed” when the footage is turned into a documentary which implausibly makes hundreds of millions of dollars at the global box office! You just can’t have your cake and eat it too, or in this case simultaneously tear down Hollywood and build it up. You have to pick an attitude, a viewpoint, a theme, and stick to it. You need to have the courage of your convictions.

I’m sure some of you will say, “Come on, lighten up, it’s only a comedy,” but theme is just as important in comedy as it is in any other genre. In fact, you could argue it’s even more important, because there’s such a thin line separating a joke that works from one that dies horribly, and because that line is drawn in large part by the theme of the overall piece and the attitude that theme generates in the audience.

For example, take the part of Tropic Thunder in which Stiller’s character, Tugg Speedman, has been kidnapped by the Flaming Dragon drug gang and forced to play Simple Jack, a role from a terrible film he’d done a few years before in the foolish hope of winning an Oscar. Suddenly, Speedman starts losing his grip on sanity and becomes committed to his new “gig” playing Simple Jack and the new relationship he thinks he’s forming with members of the drug gang. This isn’t even slightly amusing because it doesn’t make so much as a shred of sense. Speedman has been set up as a stupid and arrogant Hollywood celebrity who’s desperate to hold onto his wealth and power, not as a delusional fool who has difficulty distinguishing between fantasy and reality. The gag might have worked better if it had been assigned to Robert Downey Jr.’s character, Kirk Lazarus, who is regularly shown to be so absurdly over-committed to the craft of acting that he literally stays in character all the time and even undergoes plastic surgery in order to more convincingly play a black man. It also would have contributed to Lazarus’s ostensible character arc, in which he learns to let go of his pretentious and fundamentally fake dedication to his craft and acknowledge that he pretends to be other people because he doesn’t really know who he is himself underneath all the characters he plays. Speedman’s arc, if he’d even had one to begin with, should have been about getting over his greed and his lust for fame and box office clout, though of course that wouldn’t work as long as the movie’s happy ending was going to be the release of a documentary about a failed movie production somehow magically making staggering amounts of money and massively boosting everyone’s career as a result.

Why would Stiller & Co. make such an obvious mistake — and dozens upon dozens of others which I won’t bother going into here? Because they didn’t have the first clue about what they were trying to say.

Tags: Arbitrary, Ben Stiller, Box Office, Character Arc, Consequences, Inner Conflict, Robert Downey Jr., Theme, Tropic Thunder

Never mind the stomach-turning minstrel stereotype of Ziro the Hutt, which was so bad that it snapped Harry Knowles out of a “shit-accepting stupor” and pissed him off enough to write a really scathing review of the movie.

Forget about the odiously false and superficial girl-empowerment caricature which is Anakin’s sidekick. Nowadays, that sort of thing is unfortunately just par for the course.

And heck, let’s just ignore the fact that making a buddy movie featuring Anakin Skywalker and his cute^* female sidekick is sort of like doing a remake of Bringing Up Baby in which all the light banter takes place between Adolf Hitler and pretty little Eva Braun shortly before Hitler went on to became, well, Hitler.

Though seriously, what’s with George Lucas’ Anakin obsession? How about focusing on some genuinely interesting and sympathetic characters for a change, like, oh, say, Han Solo? Or do we keep getting L’il Orphan Ani shoved down our throats because somewhere deep in his subconscious, George Lucas recognizes that he himself has become Darth Vader, and part of him wishes he could turn back the clock to a time before he started squirting out endless rivers of shit once he learned that that’s all that’s required to part suckers like me^** from their money?

No… no… must stop… I promised myself that today, I’m just going to point out that Clone Wars is an object lesson in how not to write a great buddy movie.

First, a little effectively spoiler-free background info to make sure we’re all on the same page. Clone Wars takes place between Episode II, Attack of the Clones and Episode III, Revenge of the Sith, so Anakin and Princess Amidala are married, but he hasn’t yet begun his final descent towards the dark side. He and Obi-Wan are still busy fighting against the separatists and their droid army, but when Count Dooku arranges the abduction of Jabba the Hutt’s only son in a plot to turn the Hutt clan against the Republic, they get sent halfway across the galaxy to rescue the Huttlet (yes, seriously, he’s really called the Huttlet in the credits) and avert a crisis. And yet in spite all this chaos, Yoda decides to give an outraged and protesting Anakin an apprentice, a young Padawan named Ahsoka, and much of the movie involves Anakin and Ahsoka getting into and out of various scrapes while quarreling and sniping at each other in a way that’s no doubt supposed to be spunky and endearing.

In theory, there’s nothing all that horribly wrong with this setup. Contrast and conflict bring out character, and giving the protagonist a buddy or sidekick and creating a lot of friction between them is a great way to ensure a steady supply of both. The problem, however, is that there’s no contrast between Anakin and Ahsoka; he’s always been reckless and impulsive, and surprise surprise, so is she.

As written, Ahsoka might conceivably have worked if Anakin had been repeatedly forced to rescue his feckless apprentice from messes of her own making. He could have finally recognized himself in her and gained a new appreciation for what his former master, Obi-Wan, had gone through in teaching him. The writers didn’t go there, however, and in a larger sense that’s probably just as well, because developing the virtues of caution and restraint wouldn’t exactly make sense in context of Anakin’s larger arc towards Vaderhood.

Instead, the writers should’ve stuck with Anakin’s entirely believable and consistent objection to being given a Padawan instead of effectively dropping it within moments of bringing it up. Anakin’s ultimate downfall, after all, comes in part from selfishness, and what’s more selfish than not being willing to teach and share knowledge? They could’ve had had Ahsoka take more and more extreme and foolhardy chances (and get into more and more awful trouble) in repeated attempts to win Anakin’s respect and approval, and he could have rescued her more and more grudgingly and pushed her away more and more vehemently each time.

Furthermore, the writers should have taken better advantage of preexisting Star Wars mythology. Jedi knights aren’t supposed to develop any personal ties of any kind which might distract them from their service to the Republic or corrupt their devotion to its ideals. That’s why Anakin’s marriage to Padme in Attack of the Clones had to be kept a secret, and that’s why many in the Jedi Council were opposed to inducting Anakin into the order in the first place, because he’d already grown old enough to form a deep attachment to his mother. Anakin’s return to his homeworld of Tatooine to bring back Jabba’s son should have stirred up all the old wounds caused by his mother’s death, and the writers could have used that by making Anakin finally realize that he actually cares a great deal about his apprentice — that he’s formed a sort of familial bond with her, in fact — and that he desperately needs to save her from Count Dooku’s ambush and embrace her as his apprentice. In one sense, this would have been positive growth and development for Anakin as a person, and in another it would have been one more mile of blacktop on the road towards his future role as a betrayer of the Republic and a lord of the Sith, which would’ve made for some tremendous and affecting dramatic irony.

Even more importantly, what little superficial conflict there is between Anakin and Ahsoka has nothing to do with the theme or plot of the story. It has absolutely no influence on the outcome. In my fantasy better version of the movie, Count Dooku would have defeated Anakin and Ahsoka individually; they would have had to work together to win out in the end, and because he would have had to learn to accept her as his apprentice and she would have had to learn to accept him as her master in order for them to work together, their relationship would have been organically tied into the larger framework of the story — in my version, everything that they went through would have mattered.

Sadly, though, Darth Lucas didn’t bother with any of that, and for a change, it appears he’s being punished for it at the box office. Clone Wars is only going to make about $15M on its opening weekend, well below expectations, and I’m willing to bet it won’t have that much in the way of legs either. Too bad for everyone concerned they didn’t make a better film.

 

 

 

 

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^*If by “cute” you mean “obnoxious”.

 

 

 

 

**In my defense, I saw Clone Wars with a friend for his birthday, so I didn’t have any choice in the matter. In my anti-defense, I had a more or less OK time with it despite all the problems I mentioned above — and the many other ones I didn’t get into here. I more or less agree with Cinematical that large parts of the movie are good, brainless, action-oriented fun… as long as you hold your nose at times and completely turn off your brain all the way through. So shoot me. Or slice off my head with a light sabre. At least it was no Brown Bunny

Tags: Anakin, Anakin Skywalker, Attack of the Clones, Box Office, Bringing Up Baby, Character Arc, Clone Wars, Consequences, Contrast, Cornering, George Lucas, Revenge of the Sith, Star Wars, Sympathy

“I’ve seen now what I have to become to stop men like him.”

That one line from the trailer sums up what The Dark Knight wants to be about — Bruce Wayne’s internal battle over whether he really wants to turn into the kind of person he’d have to become to defeat the likes of the Joker, and by extension the larger question of just how much good has to compromise in order to defeat evil. It’s a question which really connects with the zeitgeist right about now, what with all the fear and scare-mongering over terrorism and the justifications being thrown around for torture, rendition, spying and so on, which is one reason the movie is doing so well at the box office.

Note, however, that I said that’s what the movie wants to be about. Unfortunately, it doesn’t entirely hit the mark.  No process of internal change or growth happens all at once; it inevitably involves a series of steps.  In fact, that’s pretty much the definition of a character arc — the steps the character takes in growing and changing over the course of the story. Good screenwriting involves (among many other things) dramatizing all the important components of the protagonist’s arc in a smooth, believable and interesting fashion. In The Dark Knight, though, one of the biggest and most important steps happens entirely offscreen!

A little background. The Joker has announced that he’s going to kill someone new every day until Batman comes forward and unmasks himself, and he’s begun to deliver on his threat. Bruce decides he can’t take the guilt anymore, so he tells Harvey Dent, Gotham City’s crusading District Attorney, to call a press conference at which he’ll announce that he’s Batman and turn himself in to the police.  Batman hanging up his cowl and going to jail — pretty dramatic, huh?  Of course, we know it can’t happen because then there’d be no sequels and probably no movie either, but it’s a great idea because it creates a ton of tension: we’re dying to see what happens to change his mind and how much the decision to keep being Batman and risk the lives of more innocents costs him.

At the press conference, though, Dent is the one who announces that he’s Batman and turns himself in, and Bruce Wayne just stands around on the sidelines looking rich and lounge-y. WTF? Seriously, OMGWTFBBQ? Well, later we find out that Dent persuaded Batman to use him as bait to trap the Joker instead of just turning himself in and trusting the Joker to stop killing people. (Like that was ever a good plan anyway.) This makes for a decent moment of surprise at the press conference when the wrong Batman steps forward, but it comes at the expense of the most important turning point in Bruce Wayne’s entire character arc — when he decides not to give up and to keep fighting no matter the cost.

Look at it this way: for Bruce Wayne to decide to give in to the Joker’s demands, he should have reached the point of ultimate despair. He should have put everything he had into the fight against the Joker, and yet the Joker should have utterly defeated him. Giving up should have seemed like the only viable option remaining, because it should’ve been absolutely clear that there was just no conceivable way he could ever win without either killing a whole boatload of innocent bystanders in the process or turning into a monster even worse than the Joker — or more likely, both. Then surrendering would almost make sense, and we’d share Batman’s despair.

The problem is that at this point in the movie, we haven’t yet seen him give his all against the Joker. In fact, we haven’t even seen him come close. They’ve really only just begun to scuffle, and their biggest encounters are yet to come. So what does that make Batman, a quitter? A wimp? A loser?

Now think about what it should take to change his mind at this point. Remember, the Joker should have beaten him at every turn and left him with nothing but the nuclear option, becoming even worse than the Joker in order to defeat him, which would be the ultimate Pyrrhic victory. Given the theme of the movie, there are really only two basic options. First, something or someone could restore Bruce’s faith in himself, his confidence that he can win and his certainty that he’s inherently good enough that he could never become truly evil like the Joker. Or second, it could become clear to him that however horrible the collateral damage caused by his battle against the Joker might be, the damage done by a Joker unrestrained by the Batman would be far, far worse.

What The Dark Knight offers us, though, is Harvey Dent coming up with a new plan. This suggests that Batman’s despair was pretty shallow and unnecessary — that all he actually needed to do was put a little more thought into the problem, but that he decided it would be easier to just give up. It makes Batman look even look more like a quitter. And it also makes him look kind of stupid.

Luckily, most of the rest of the movie is so crackerjack-super-fantastic-awesome-good that it’s possible to sort of gloss over this flaw while watching it, but there are some other problems I’ll talk about in future posts.

Tags: Aaron Eckhart, Batman, Box Office, Character Arc, Christian Bale, Christopher Nolan, Consequences, Cusp, Despair, Eat My Brains, Inner Conflict, Joker, Stakes, The Dark Knight, Theme, Villain's Plan, Zeitgeist

Have you ever seen the corpse of someone who jumped or fell off a tall building?  If you haven’t, count yourself lucky.  I promise you, it’s not pretty.  But in the movies (and on TV) everything’s hunky-dory if someone just catches you before you hit the ground.  Take Hancock, which is merely the latest example out of, well, a few million metric buttloads.  In a widely-seen trailer moment, Hancock teaches an obnoxious kid a lesson by tossing him about seventy five miles straight up into the sky and then catching him just a fraction of a microsecond before he slams into the pavement and explodes into a giant mess full of blood and guts and partially digested Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups and miscellaneous other substances better left unnamed.  In reality, being caught like that would be pretty much just as bad as hitting the ground, because the real problem is the force of impact.  If you want to survive a fall like that unscathed, you need to slow down gradually, not instantly.  (Hence the use of parachutes as opposed to a bunch of people standing around in a field with their arms out.)  So what Hancock should’ve done was fly well up into the sky, more or less match downward velocities with the jerk he’d tossed up there, grab him, and then gradually decelerate to a nice, easy landing.

Now, I know this is kind of nitpicking, and it may seem like I’m the only one who cares about this particular issue, but it’s representative of a larger problem.  If you want readers and audience members to suspend disbelief, whatever you write has to be completely believable within the context of the story, and it has to be internally consistent.  If that context is a magical fantasy fairy-land where people wave wands made out of special dried mushrooms and conjure up giant fluffy bunnies, then great, conjure all the giant fluffy bunnies you want… as long as people always use those special dried mushroom wands to do it.  If the context of the story is the real world, though, and you’re creating a superhero within that real world that we all live in, then even if the superhero is impossible (or at least unlike anyone that we know of who’s existed to date) the world in which the superhero exists should be the exact same world we all wake up and eat cold Pop Tarts in every day.  In other words, Hancock can be super-tough and survive a fall from the moon; that’s totally fair.  The kid, however, has to be just like every other kid on earth.  He needs a parachute.

Audiences seem pretty used to the catching thing by now, so unless you care about these things like I do, I guess you don’t have to worry about it, but you definitely do need to avoid any obvious inconsistency or implausibility that people haven’t been conditioned to accept.  It’s what I call my “people have to get squished” rule — unless there’s a good and specific reason for someone not to get squished, and unless you’ve already established that reason in your script well before the potential squishing, the logical and expected squishing has to happen.  (And by “squishing”, of course I mean whatever consequence should be unfolding in your story.)  If it doesn’t, you’ve just killed the audience’s or your reader’s suspension of disbelief.  And I promise you, a once-healthy suspension of disbelief splattered all over the ground is an ugly and unfortunate thing.

Tags: Consequences, Peter Berg, Stakes, Suspension of Disbelief, Will Smith